Hi readers and writerly friends!

This week in Reader Life, we’re going over how to practice self-care for both readers and writers. It can be hard to remember to take care of ourselves, and I think after the insane year we’ve all had with 2020, we’ve been reminded how valuable good, regular self-care is important for everyone, no matter what hobbies or occupation you may have. While these tips are geared more for readers and writers, they’re certainly applicable for any kind of creator.

Woman reading in a relaxing floral milk bath. Photo by Monstera.

Give yourself a little grace as a writer

Sometimes it’s hard being a writer—I get it. Sometimes we get writers’ block and sometimes we just don’t feel like pulling up to the computer and cranking out 1200 words a day for the month of November, or ever for that matter. Writing is hard. No matter how many times I say it, it doesn’t make the process any easier. Writing can be really, really, reeeeeally difficult sometimes. Most of the time, in fact. It’s a process that makes you swoon, cry, cringe, hyperventilate, and want to tear your hair out at every turn. It’s frustrating when you want to write but you just don’t feel motivated or inspired enough to do so. It’s frustrating when you feel motivated and inspired but you just don’t feel like writing.

Give yourself grace as a writer. Remember, writing is hard, and it takes time to finish projects. Be kind and patient with yourself and remind yourself often, that writing isn’t something that everyone can do and that’s why you’re special and essential to this world.

Read my blog post, When Writing Becomes Difficult.

Read my blog post, 5 Reasons Most Writers Quit.

Stop caring what others think and stop comparing yourself to others

This goes for both readers and writers—stop comparing yourself to other people and stop worrying about what other people think. This kind of thinking doesn’t benefit anyone and can end up consuming so much of our time and energy.

Readers, stop comparing yourselves to other readers who may have read more books than you, may be faster readers, or who have more aesthetically pleasing bookshelves (and in turn, social media feeds.)

Writers, stop comparing yourselves to other writers who may have been published before you or who have published more books than you have, writers who may come up with beautiful words or excellent writing, or writers who seem to write easily without difficulty.

Everyone should stop comparing themselves to others and remember to appreciate the good qualities about themselves and enjoy the positive things that them apart from the other people in their community.

Allow yourself to put down or part with books you dislike

Give yourself permission to DNF—Did Not Finish—books that you don’t like or feel like a chore to read. If you find the book isn’t grabbing your pages at a hundred pages in, or you realize you have to bargain with yourself to sit down and read, consider that the book in question might not be for you and that’s okay. Think carefully about the books you read and try to build a reader profile for yourself, so you know what books to seek out and which ones to avoid in the future. If you notice historical fiction is just not captivating you the way paranormal romance does, then evaluate your tastes and remember to seek out books that align with them as you search for your next read.

Take frequent writing breaks to recharge your creative battery

Woman writing and using a laptop. Photo by cottonbro.

This piece of advice is essential. We’ve all been there —we glance at the clock and gasp after spending hours writing or reading the day away, hunched over our books and computer screens, in some other world. For readers and writers alike, remember to take frequent breaks to break up the tedium that reading/writing for hours so often brings. Readers, stand up and move around between chapters and writers, do some yoga or some kind of gentle movement to loosen up and get you out of your head. Consider taking a walk outside for fresh air or stroll down to your favorite coffee shop for a post-chapter treat!

Read for pleasure and not for work

Many of us creative bookworms often read to create content for our YouTubes, blogs, and social media accounts and we often read to review books. However, I implore you, dear reader, to remember to read just to read. Read for pleasure and read books that you enjoy. You don’t always have to read the most anticipated book of the year or the book of the month, especially if you can’t find time to read for yourself.

Write just to write

This is easier said than done, right? At first yes. Try writing just to dump all of your thoughts, feelings, items you were supposed to remember, lists and anything else taking up creative space in your mind. This is called brain-dumping and it can work wonders for writers who get stuck in their heads or are easily distracted. Try writing morning pages—Invented by Julia Cameron—where you mindlessly write for several pages, first thing in the morning to clear your mind for the important work you will do later.

Read The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron here.

Stay on a writing schedule

Read or write regularly. This will make it easier to sit down to work on your manuscript or dig into your reading material every single day. It might be hard to remember at first, so set alarms for yourself until it becomes a habit for you. Carve out a space and time for completing this activity daily and it will, slowly but surely grow increasingly easier for you. Eventually it will become like second nature. When that time rolls around each day, you’ll feel the writing/reading itch creep in and you’ll know what to do.

 Check out my blog post, Writing Every Day: What Writing as A Journalist Taught Me.

Maintain a balanced diet

While this isn’t exactly related to reading or writing, it is related to being human. No matter what your hobby or occupation is, balanced diets are integral to your health and should never be left out of the self-care conversation. Remember to drink plenty of water and eat balanced meals throughout the day. Consider having a snack with your book and treat yourself to an occasional glass of wine or coffee while you write.

Move your body regularly

Much like the practice of maintaining a balanced diet is important for all readers and writers (and people in general,) exercising regularly is as well. Regular, quality exercise is crucial to your health and can help you keep your energy and mood elevated long after you’ve finished working out. There are countless studies that support the notion that exercise is directly linked to happiness and maintaining a positive mood and energy. So, like reading and writing, set aside time to exercise and loosen up.

Pro Tip: Couple your breaks with short, gentle stretch routines to knock out two birds with one stone.

Check out my Yoga For Writers: A 30-Minute Routine To Do Between Writing Sessions blog post.

Get plenty of good-quality sleep

Writing/reading are ultimately mental activities, and what we know about the brain is that brain function decreases when there’s a lack of sleep in our lives. This article from the Sleep Foundation explains how lack of sleep can impair our day-to-day cognitive function.

Sleep is an important time for the brain. Levels of brain activity change in each stage of sleep — including both rapid eye movement (REM) and non-REM (NREM) sleep — and evidence increasingly suggests that sleep enhances most types of cognitive function.

Getting enough hours of high-quality sleep fosters attention and concentration, which are a prerequisite for most learning. Sleep also supports numerous other aspects of thinking including memory, problem-solving, creativity, emotional processing, and judgment.

—Sleep Foundation

How Lack of Sleep Impacts Cognitive Performance and Focus

Investing in yourself is also directly investing in your creativity and writing career. Consider what lifestyle changes you can make to positively impact your sleeping habits.

• Adhere to a strict sleep schedule

• Pick up a set of noise-canceling earbuds/earplugs

• Upgrade your mattress and bedframe

• Create a practical and nourishing night routine

• Pick up some blackout curtains

• Get a white noise or sound effects machine

• Treat yourself to luxuriously soft bedsheets and comfy pillows

• Cut off the caffeine in the afternoon

• Turn your bathroom into an at-home spa for heavy writing days

Don’t forget to celebrate both the small and big wins

Two friends working creatively outside with coffee. Photo by Keira Burton.

Don’t forget to celebrate your small and big wins, no matter whether or not you’re a reader, writer, both, or neither. If you knock out a book, make sure to update your Goodreads Reading Challenge, and treat yourself to a coffee. If you manage to write through a particularly difficult chapter of your novel reward yourself with a break and 30 minutes of your favorite TV show. Celebrate in whatever way makes sense for you and your life, but make sure you don’t forget to set aside time to recognize when you’ve hit major and minor milestones and completed your goals. The challenges and wins alike can all blur together and without taking time to reflect and cherish your successes, its easy to get caught up in the drudges of the writing world. Don’t let the negativity and workload drag you down. Honor you small and big wins alike by taking time to celebrate the hard work you’ve done and how far you’ve come

Meet another reader/writer for coffee

I know this will be difficult during the COVID-19 pandemic but when this all blows over, make sure to reach out to your friends and family to catch up over coffee or a nice meal, and gush about all of your favorite reads or current writerly projects. In the mean time, if you can abide by social distancing guidelines while meeting a member of your safety circle or visiting with a new friend, try to find time to do so, but safely.

And don’t let isolation keep you locked inside —find your next adventure between the pages here.

Pro tip: Try working outside at a local park, in a coffee shop, or at the library for a change of scenery. Sometimes getting out of the house and out of your usual writing space might help spark inspiration and refresh your creativity. Plan a co-working date with a friend or colleague for extra focusing power.

And that’s it for my self-care tips for readers and writers. Have you practiced any of these tips before? What has worked for you in your reading/writing practice? Do you experience any overlap between the two activities? Let me know your thoughts in the comments below!

Further Reading

• Writing Every Day: What Writing as A Journalist Taught Me

• When Writing Becomes Difficult

• 5 Reasons Most Writers Quit

• Yoga For Writers: A 30-Minute Routine To Do Between Writing Sessions

—Payton

Hi readers and writerly friends!

This week in Freelancing, we’re discussing a little something that hit close to home for me and that’s when writing becomes difficult. Writing is hard. Full stop.

I get it—trust me. I just came back from a writing hiatus and while I wish I didn’t take that time away from writing, it’s hard to picture me where I am now without it. So, as we get into it, let’s think of this as a group therapy session.

Deep breath in and out. It’s going to be okay.

Now, let’s do this.

Woman covering her face with her hands. Photo by Anthony Tran.

Writing is hard. No matter how many times I say it, it doesn’t make the process any easier. Writing can be really, really, reeeeeally difficult sometimes. Most of the time, in fact. It’s a process that makes you swoon, cry, cringe, hyperventilate, and want to tear your hair out at every turn. It’s frustrating when you want to write but you just don’t feel motivated or inspired enough to do so. It’s frustrating when you feel motivated and inspired but you just don’t feel like writing. It’s frustrating when you don’t want to write but you have internal and external pressures on yourself that make you feel like you should be writing when you’re not, and that doesn’t feel good either.

And even if you managed to get past those hurdles, writing can be hard for a plethora of other reasons as well. It’s frustrating when the words just aren’t working on the page, or when you just can’t seem to iron out the kinks in your plot so that it makes sense.

I’m raising my hand here.

Writing is not an easy feat and it’s not supposed to be. Writing is a trial. It requires bravery and vulnerability, and a willingness to be consistent. It feels incredibly gross sometimes—like when you know you need to just sit down and crank out that first draft, but you keep self-editing your previous passages out of fear of inadequacy.

But I assure you, if you’re feeling the burn, you’re heading in the right direction. Writing is a process that is meant to make you want to pull your hair out sometimes, to make you feel like you’re going insane. (And if it’s any consolation, tons of famous writers were nutty.)

This hair-pulling, however is meant to help you grow as a writer. The frustration you feel is the fuel you need to burn through your writing struggles. When you’re feeling frustrated with how nonsensical your plot is, you’re forced to decide to scrap the idea or go down the rewriting path. This teaches writers about story structure and revising and self-editing.

Cumpled up paper. Photo by Steve Johnson.

The frustration you feel with creating unique, believable worldbuilding and setting that’s rich and just as complex and enchanting as the characters that dwell there forces you really understand your characters and the space you’ve created for them. It teaches writers how to really step into those worlds in their minds and envision themselves actually standing there. It forces you to travel to distant lands and capture these incredible places on the page because otherwise, no one but you would get to enjoy them.

The frustration you feel when writers block hits you like ton of bricks forces you to take a step back from your writing, to take a breather, and return to it with fresh eyes. This teaches writers to have a healthy relationship with writing. It teaches them how to take a break when things just aren’t working out and to return after mulling it over for a while. Your writing will be all the better for it.

There are many frustrations that come with writing and they’re exactly why writing is difficult. It’s not meant to be easy. But then again, nothing ever worth it is. Writing will test your patience, often. It doesn’t mean you should stop writing. It means you should find a solution to the problem you’re facing and then continue writing. Writing is a lot like horseback riding—the writing is the horse, you are the rider, and this incredible beast just keeps throwing you. But you get back up, again and again and again. Because writing isn’t a race. It’s a marathon. It’s a process.

Writing is for most, a passion. It’s an epic, tumultuous love. And if you’re feeling down and out about your writing, maybe all you need to do is rekindle your love of writing. You need to fall in love with writing again.

Single red rose on pages. Photo by Annie Spratt.

Think about what made you love writing in the first place:

• Did you fall in love with writing because it was the best/only way to express your emotions?

• Did you fall in love with writing because you had a burning story inside you, just itching to be told?

• Did you fall in love with writing because your wild and uncontrollable Imaginate just couldn’t be contained?

• Did you fall in love with writing because it helped you get through a difficult time in your life?

• Did you fall in love with writing to escape or to feel free?

• Did you fall in love with writing because of the way it made you feel?

• Did you fall in love with writing to connect with yourself or someone else?

Why did you fall in love with writing? Does that reason still hold true today? What if anything, has changed for you? Because something, somewhere once drew you to writing and somehow you’ve lost sight of that. So, go back and fall in love with writing once again.

It doesn’t matter if your why has changed. It only matters that you still love to write. That’s what makes a writer. A love of writing is at every writers core.

• If you need some help with inspiration, 500 Writing Prompts can help you to brainstorm some new ideas.

• If you’re stuck on the details of your novel, try getting organized with The Novel Planner.

• If you are still struggling to pick up the pencil, consider starting a journal or morning pages. This is a practice created by Julia Cameron in her book, The Artist’s Way and its basically a daily brain dump. Just write everything you can, the good, the bad, and the ugly. No one is meant to read this stuff so let all your reservations go and just write. This will help ease you back into writing, even if your journal/morning pages have no structure whatsoever.

And that’s it for my sappy thoughts on when writing gets difficult. I know it can get really tough sometimes. Just try to fall in love with writing and never let that little fire go out. It sometimes helps to have writerly friends who can inspire you and cheer you on as well. Let’s get a discussion going in the comments. What’s the most difficult thing about writing for you? What made you fall in love with writing? Let me know down below!

Related topics:

• 5 Reasons Most Writers Quit

• 20 Things Writers Can Learn From Dreamers

• Self-Care Tips for Readers and Writers

• Yoga For Writers: A 30-Minute Routine To Do Between Writing Sessions

Read more from Freelancing!

—Payton

Hello readers and writerly friends!

This week in Reader Life, we’re taking it back to the basics—mindfulness, intention, and self-love. The writing process can be tough sometimes. We often get so into our writing that we forget to step back and take care of ourselves. With NaNoWriMo just around the corner, I thought this would be a great time to step out of my usual writing advice avenue and help you remember to show yourself some love.  Whether you’re stuck at a  desk 9-5 reading or writing, this yoga routine designed for writers will help you get back to your center, get out of your own head, and relax while also waking up all those sedentary muscles.

And lets be honest, after writing an blog post about yoga it makes me want to get back into my own practice. Back in 2017 I was in the best shape of my life with my daily yoga routine and I know I need to come back to the mat. I love yoga—I always feel so energetic yet relaxed after even a brief session. It is a distinctly renewed feeling you get from yoga, that you just can’t find in any other physical practice. I always feel relaxed and less stressed, energized and clear of mind after my yoga routine and this is great headspace to be in for writing.

Many people will argue they can’t do yoga because “I just can’t get into it” or they’re “not flexible enough!” It’s all about the journey—the baby steps. You can’t be come completely fluid overnight and just the same, yoga isn’t for people who are flexible already, it’s for people who are wanting to become flexible. Likewise, it will require a bit of concentration, perseverance, and time to get into yoga seriously. I remember when I first got into it and I just felt so silly doing yoga by myself in my tiny bedroom at home. It was quite hard to take it seriously and not get in my head about it. You just have to remind yourself that this is for your mental and emotion health and your writing as much as it is for your own physical health and stick with it!

This yoga routine is tailor-made for writers and readers chained to the desk for ours on end each day. It focuses on the shoulders, neck, and back, which tend to be problem areas for us writers. All of the movements in this simple, 30-minute routine are beginner-level. No human-pretzeling necessary! Once you have done this quick little mindful routine a handful of times, it quickly becomes a nice little break between writing sessions.

Before we get into our own flow, lets go over a few of the yoga basics for anyone here that is new to the yoga practice.

Movements—Yoga is all about slow, smooth, controlled movements. There is no need to rush. Take the time to linger in movements that feel good to you and ultimately listen to your body.

Breathing—One of the key elements of yoga is the breathing. And in fact, this is the part I struggled with the most because I kept thinking “ugh, why do I need to worry about breathing. It’s not like I’m going to forget how to do it.” But breathing is integral to the practice and if you can put those nagging, unhelpful thoughts aside, you might see how good it feels to do some mindful breathing. You want to take slow, deep breaths. Focus on your breath and be aware of how it feels to let your lungs fully fill with air as you inhale and fully empty as you exhale. Briefly hold your breath and let it linger in your chest and imagine your oxygen-rich breath being pushed gently to all of your muscles. In yoga, the biggest part to remember about breathing is to inhale when you move into a pose and to exhale as you move out of that pose. You should take it slow at first but with time, you will become more fluid with it.

Body and Mind Awareness—Of course this directly ties into the movements and breathing elements of yoga, but its important that you empty your thoughts and try to keep a clear, focused mind while working on your practice. Focus on your breath, your movements, and try to think positive thoughts. When you find yourself going down the rabbit hole of divergent thoughts (don’t worry it happens to all of us) take a moment to breathe deeply and re-center yourself. If you’re struggling to take the yoga practice seriously, just say to yourself, “This is a special time I carved out for myself so I can remember to practice mindfulness, self-care and love.” Nagging thoughts will have a hard time arguing with that, trust me. This is a time to meditate and relax, so shut out all of your worries, responsibilities and stresses of daily life.

Equipment—This is optional and it all comes down to preference. You’re welcome to use a yoga mat if you like, but you can also use a towel or blanket if you don’t have a mat. If you’ve got a fluffy carpeted area, that will work too. Wear loose, comfortable clothing and keep some water handy in case you get thirsty during your flow. (No worries, we won’t be doing any serious exertion here.) Additionally, you can put on some nature sounds or soft instrumental music in the background. Candles and soft lighting goes great with yoga as well!

Now that we covered all of the basics, are you ready? Let’s get started!

All poses mentioned in this blog post are accompanied by links that further explain how to execute the pose perfectly without strain or injury. Just remember to take it slow. Yoga should never hurt, so be aware of how you feel during the practice and take it one step at a time.

Section 1: Meditation and Neck

To begin, come to the mat and sit with your back straight and legs crossed or tucked underneath you, whichever feels most comfortable. Place your hands gently on your knees and close your eyes in Meditation Pose. Remember to have a good posture, but relax and try to clear your mind, focusing on your breath and becoming aware of your body. Hold this post for about 30 breaths (1 inhale + 1 exhale = 1 breath). Conclude this with a long, Lion’s Breath and proceed with the rest of the routine.

Next, lets work on loosening the neck and shoulders. Do the following steps, while remembering to take deep breaths and move slowly:

1. Roll your shoulders forward eight times and then back eight times.

2. Roll your head in gentle circles five times to the right and then five times to the left. Look gently to the right, as far as you can and roll your head down and to the left. Do this five times and then repeat, switching sides.

3.Bring your chin down to your chest as far as you can, lowering your shoulders gently. You should feel a deep, refreshing stretch curving up your spine and down the sides of your neck. Hold this stretch for three to five breaths. If you like, you can gently massage your temples or just behind your ears. Repeat.

4. Next, stretch you neck to the left and right and hold each stretch for several breaths. You can add a gentle pressure to your head by placing your palm to your cheek and pressing slightly. You should not feel any strain here but popping in the spine and neck joints is normal.

5. Bring your hands together behind you and gently press them outward, as much as you can without straining or pulling too hard. Draw your shoulder blades together in a nice, gentle squeeze. Hold this for three to five breaths. Release and return to your meditation pose.

6. Shake it out! (Gently!) Move your neck and shoulders in whatever way feels nice. Gently shake our your hands give your shoulders a little shimmy.

Section 2: Back and Shoulders

Now that your neck is nice and loosened up, lets continue on to the rest of the poses, with more focus on the back and shoulders. Remember to take these movements slowly and breathe deeply as you go. Inhale as you move into a pose and exhale as you move out of the pose. Hold each pose for four to eight breaths or longer if you like.

1. Start this sequence in a Seated Twist. You will likely feel a gentle, warm stretch in your side and legs here, and again popping in joints is normal. Repeat twice on each side.

2. Bring your legs under you and transition into Cat Cow pose. Repeat four to six times. For this pose, simply move with your breaths—no need to hold either part of the pose for any extended period of time. Just inhale and curve the spine gently up towards the sky, then on your exhale, push the air out slowly as you bring the belly down and curve the tail and head upwards.

3. Tuck your feet under you, bring the tailbone backwards and sink softly into Child’s Pose. Stretch your arms out past your head and let your forehead kiss the mat. Hold this pose for a few breaths.

4. Raise up on your hands and knees again back into Cat Cow and repeat four to six times.

5. Return to Child’s Pose.

6. Once in Child’s Pose, bring your arms around and clasp them behind you, facing them upward in Seal Pose. Hold this for a couple of breaths then return to Child’s Pose for a few more breaths.

7. From Child’s Pose, use your hands and knees to transition to Sphinx Pose. Rest gently on your elbows and point your toes out behind you. Keep your neck and shoulders low and unhunched and face forward. Remember to smile for yourself.

8. Next, push yourself up into Cobra Pose. Remember to breathe here. If this pose is too challenging return to Sphinx Pose and take a few breaths. If you are able to, hold Cobra Pose for two breaths.

9. Lower yourself back down to Sphinx Pose and slowly curl back into Child’s Pose. Then bring your torso down to the earth and Thread The Needle on both sides. Rest softly on your head and shoulder’s her and don’t smash them into the mat. Instead, allow them to kiss the mat softly and keep most of your weight on your knees which should be spaced apart slightly.

10. Next, slowly move to a flat position on your back. Bring your arms over your head and reach as far as you can. Point the toes here and lengthen the spine. Get a nice, warm stretch moving through the entire body. Softly roll wrists and ankles. Flutter your fingers and toes. Take turns hugging one knee into your chest and then the other in Half Wind Relieving Pose.

11. Lastly, lay with your palms facing upward and at your sides in Corpse Pose. Close your eyes. Remain in this pose for a few moments, breathing deeply and relaxing before retuning to the desk. When you rise, come up slowly to avoid getting a head rush. Breathe deeply and when you’re fully standing once again, give yourself a hug. Remember to drink some water when you get back to the desk.

You did it! See, it wasn’t that bad, was it? I bet you’re feeling pretty good right about now, huh? Now that you’re all relaxed and rejuvenated, you’re ready to start your next writing session. Want a free, handy PDF guide for this routine for next time? Click here! (IT HAS CATS!) That way, next time you’ll be all ready to go when you need a break from the writing process.

So, what did you think of this relaxing 30-minute routine for writers? Do you like yoga? Have you ever tried it before today? How do you like to relax between writing sessions? What was your favorite pose mentioned in this flow? Let me know in the comments down below!

Thumbnail photo by Zen Bear Yoga.

—Payton

Hi writerly friends!

One more week of romance posts for February and then we’re back to our regularly scheduled postings. This week in Reader Life, I’m giving you guys a guide to planning your perfect writerly spa get away! Couple it with your Romantic writing retreat for an amazing writer vacation! Next week, I’ll give you guys my list of the top 10 mushy romance songs so be sure to check that out!

Of course, you can make sue of these tips alone or have a partner participate!

Take a bubble bath

I mean it. Take a bath. While you may not be used to taking baths opposed to showers,  they have been proven to be stress-relieving and relaxing. Pop in a bath bomb or some flower petals, light some candles, and grab the bubbles because you’re getting ready to have you-time!

Get and give massages

Sitting at a desk, typing for hours on end leaves the back, shoulders, and neck feeling strained. Book yourself a professional massage, couple’s massages or get with your partner and trade massages. Listen to relaxing music and put on some candles to set the mood.

Wind down with wine

Make sure to drink responsibly of course, but once in a while, it’s nice to take a break from writing and sit down with your favorite glass of red or rosé. Grab your current read or pop in ear buds to enjoy an audiobook while you wind down with your wine.

Yoga for writers

Like I said about the massages, writing can be strenuous work when you’re doing it for hours on end. Hop up from your desk every couple of hours and do some yoga! Kaitlin from Ink and Quills has come up with an amazing, yet simple 30-minute yoga routine for writers and I am obsessed with it! Click here to check it out!

Aromatherapy

If you’ve paid attention to the previous items on this list, then you know what I am going to say. Using candles and diffusers are a great way to keep your writing space smelling fresh and aromatherapy has been said to improve focus and productivity. Plus, the smell of lavender is just the best, so why not?

And that’s it for my 5 romantic spa tips for writers! What did you think of this list? Have you treated yourself lately? If not, try out some of these ideas and let me know what you think! Comment below and as always, thanks for reading!

Further Reading:

• Writing Every Day: What Writing as A Journalist Taught Me

• When Writing Becomes Difficult

• 5 Reasons Most Writers Quit

• Yoga For Writers: A 30-Minute Routine To Do Between Writing Sessions

Thumbnail photo by Breakingpic.

—Payton